If you have a picky eater, mealtime can be a challenge. Many parents feel the stress of trying to get their children to eat a balanced diet. It helps to know that picky eating can be a normal part of childhood development. With the right strategies, you can help your child build a healthier relationship with food. Here are four tips for managing mealtime with a picky eater.
Remove the Demands at Mealtime
Mealtime can feel like a battle when you repeatedly ask your child to take a bite or finish everything on their plate. This pressure can create negative feelings about food, which makes it harder for your child to enjoy eating.
Instead, try to create a relaxed, stress-free mealtime. Keep the conversation distraction-free and away from food. For example, you might talk about something fun that happened during the day or ask about a favorite book or game.
You can also increase your child’s exposure to new foods throughout the day without asking them to eat anything. The goal is to make a variety of foods feel normal. Put different foods on the table, or let your child see and smell a new food with no expectation to taste it. Over time, this can reduce worry and build curiosity.
Involve Your Child in the Food Process
Getting your child involved in food preparation can reduce resistance and create positive experiences around food. Let them help with simple tasks like making snacks for family members, stirring ingredients, or arranging food on plates. These jobs give your child a chance to touch, smell, and explore foods without pressure to eat them.
You can also ask your child to help make the grocery list or come along to the store. Children often feel more confident trying foods they helped choose or prepare, because they feel ownership of the meal.
Let Your Child Experience New Foods With All Their Senses
When you introduce a new food, let your child explore it in a low-pressure, sensory way. In feeding therapy, we often use this approach to help children get comfortable with a food before they try to eat it.
Start by having your child smell the food or touch a crumb-sized piece to their lips. Then let them feel the texture with their fingers, and talk about its color, temperature, and shape. These small steps make a new food more familiar and less scary.
It’s also best not to serve a new food next to only your child’s favorites, since they will likely choose the familiar food. Instead, serve the new food with something your child will eat but that isn’t their top choice. For example, pair a new vegetable with pasta or crackers they already accept.
Make Mealtime a Positive, Family-Centered Experience
Mealtime is not just about eating. It’s an opportunity for family bonding, language development, and positive feelings about food.
One way to build this is to serve meals family-style, so everyone can help themselves. Your child can see and smell the food as it’s passed around the table, which makes unfamiliar foods feel more familiar. Letting them choose what goes on their plate also gives them a sense of control.
Mealtime conversation supports language development, too. Encourage your child to talk about their day or share their thoughts on the food they’re eating. This keeps the mood relaxed and builds communication skills.
What Is a Food Jag?
A food jag is when a child wants to eat the same food for every meal, sometimes for days or weeks. It is common in picky eaters. Our speech-language pathologist Megan explains what a food jag is and how to help your child try something new in this short Therapy Talk video.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if my child is a picky eater or has a feeding problem?
Picky eating usually passes as children grow. A feeding problem is more likely if your child accepts a very small number of foods, gags often, loses weight, or has regular distress at meals. If you are unsure, a feeding evaluation can give you answers.
Should I make my child try one bite?
Pressure to take a bite often backfires. It is usually better to keep offering the food, let your child see and touch it, and let them decide whether to taste it.
How many times should I offer a new food?
Many children need to see a food many times before they accept it. Keep offering small amounts without pressure, and celebrate steps like touching or smelling the food.
How ETLC Can Help
Navigating mealtime with a picky eater can be difficult, but these strategies can help your child feel more comfortable and confident around food. If you need more help reducing mealtime stress, our team can work with your family. Enrichment Therapy & Learning Center has locations in Johnston and North Liberty, IA, with virtual services also available.
Learn more about feeding therapy at ETLC or schedule a free consultation to talk with a member of our team.
You may also find these pages helpful:
- Is Your Child a Problem Eater? 5 Questions to Help You Know
- 5 Tips to Create Positive Mealtime Experiences
- Thanksgiving With a Picky Eater: 5 Tips and Tricks
About the Author
Sonia Strueby, M.A., CCC-SLP, is the founder of Enrichment Therapy & Learning Center. With over 25 years of experience as a speech-language pathologist, Sonia has dedicated her career to helping children overcome complex communication and academic challenges. She has advanced training and a special focus on treating dyslexia and childhood apraxia of speech, and she is passionate about providing families with a clear path to success.
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