Self-Esteem for Kids With Dyslexia: How to Help

“I’m the worst reader in my class.”

“This is going to take so long.”

“I don’t like anything about school.”

“I’m just so tired.”

These are the kinds of things reading interventionists hear when they work with students who are struggling to read. Building self-esteem for kids with dyslexia starts with understanding just how discouraging this struggle can feel. It can be incredibly difficult for young students with dyslexia to understand their strengths, or even see themselves as intelligent. After all, up until third and fourth grade, learning to read is one of the main goals of your student’s schooling. Then, during third and fourth grade, students are expected to begin using their ability to read to learn new concepts independently. They have to read to learn. Reading is not something that struggling readers can “escape” from.

Why Self-Esteem Struggles Are So Common With Dyslexia

A student with dyslexia is reminded of their weaknesses constantly as they are repeatedly asked to complete tasks that are difficult for them. Furthermore, they have to consistently compare themselves to students around them who seemingly glide through reading activities.

With all of these obstacles, how can we help our students who have been diagnosed with a reading disorder or dyslexia see past their reading difficulties and help them build their self-esteem?

A “Sea of Strengths” Perspective

In her book Overcoming Dyslexia, Sally Shaywitz, M.D. encourages viewing students with dyslexia through what she calls a “sea of strengths” perspective. Dr. Shaywitz has studied dyslexia and effective reading intervention for years at Yale’s Dyslexia Resource Center. She completed a longitudinal study that allowed her to follow students from kindergarten until they were young adults.

Throughout her research, she consistently found that students with dyslexia possessed a vast set of strengths untouched by their reading difficulties. In fact, many of these students developed additional skills and strengths as they found ways to learn in spite of their reading challenges. Shaywitz argues that conversations about dyslexia too often focus only on a child’s struggles, overlooking real capabilities like reasoning, creativity, empathy, visualization, and novel thinking. She emphasizes that identifying and nurturing those strengths, rather than letting them go unnoticed, is essential to how a child comes to understand and define themselves.

Shaywitz urges parents, teachers, and ultimately students to view dyslexia as a small weakness in a vast sea of strengths that make up who that child is. So what about your child? What strengths do they have? How can you help them see and nurture those strengths? How can they use those strengths to help them compensate for skills that are more difficult for them?

Ways to Help Build Self-Esteem for Kids With Dyslexia

Below are more ideas for helping to bolster the self-esteem of a student with dyslexia.

• Tell your child that dyslexia does not result from a lack of intelligence or cognitive ability. People with dyslexia actually use their brains differently from others when they are reading. Different areas in the brain and different pathways are used to complete the same tasks related to reading. Their brains are just “wired” a little differently. Some people are just born that way, and that is ok.
• Help your child think about learning to read using a “growth mindset.” For more information about growth mindset, see our guide to promoting a growth mindset.
• Talk about your various strengths and weaknesses. Help them see that everyone is made up of a “sea of strengths” and weaknesses. Talk about things that you struggled to learn or times you made mistakes while reading. Make sure they know that it is ok to make those mistakes. It’s part of learning!

A Child With Dyslexia Needs a Champion

Most importantly, Shaywitz stresses that a child with dyslexia needs a champion, someone who supports them unwaveringly and stays their advocate through the hard moments. That champion expresses genuine optimism for the child’s future, both through words and everyday actions. Perhaps most important, Shaywitz notes, the struggling reader needs someone who doesn’t just believe in them, but turns that belief into consistent, persistent action, working relentlessly to make sure they get the reading help and support they need.

Source: Shaywitz, Sally. Overcoming Dyslexia. New York: Vintage Books, 2003.

We’re Here to Help

If you have questions about supporting your child’s confidence and reading development, contact our team at ETLC, we’re happy to help.